We Heart Cats

I’m pretty sad : ( Today my fiannce and I gave Hudson back (the cat we have been cat-sitting for, for about four months) He came with a broken tail and a lot of nerve, and left with a neon green shark water gun, and a stuffed owl.

You will be missed nutty little ball of love

To make myself feel better I am saving cats from being sucked up by a vacumn

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We heart cats…really, really big ones…

Meet Odin:


Odin lives at the Six Flags discover zoo near San Fransisco and he loves swimming. And, apparently looking really terrifying? He’s six years old, but was hand fed and grew up at the zoo (kind of sad)…his owner realized his love for water when he threw a piece of meat in and Odin dove for it like it wasn’t no thang. A swimming Bengal tiger, amazing! Most large cats don’t like the water but they have been known to hunt and even bathe for pleasure.

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I hope all of you had a super fantastic Memorial Day weekend! I did, I basically ate everything that came within a 2 foot radius of my mouth…anyway as I’m sitting here browsing the internet, thinkin’ about cats, I see this blog which has some interesting cat facts on it..

Like, did you know that a cats brain is more similar to our brains than a dogs? Figures that’s why cats are moody. They left out some important facts though, like:

-Your cat will prefer to drink toilet water to the water you leave in its dish.
-Cats fart, it stinks, and sometimes poo comes out [they often look surprised after this]
-Cats love tuna and milk sure, but they also love Product 19
-No matter how heavy you THINK your vase is, your cat will knock it over, flood your living room, and make you homicidal (preferably at 5am)

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TGIF

The cats and I are NOT having a good day, we are hot and cranky. I want to laugh and so do you, right?

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Pet insurance is on the rise cat owners! Tesco Pet insurance says with summer coming, pet owners will see a rise in pet insurance claims because during the summer there’s more potential hazards for both dogs AND cats. I can agree with that.

Do any of you not have pet insurance? I don’t, maybe I should but with one cat it seems silly…I’ll be biting my tongue if he gets really sick but the chances of that happening are slime to none because he’s immune to um, anything awful. Except worms, he did manage to get worms.

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There are no words to describe the greatness of this tattoo

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HELP ME CAT LOVERS! I adore my cats, really I do but they are driving me up the freaking wall lately and I have no idea what’s making them like this? Is it because it’s spring and they have the fever? Am I just pregnant and cranky? Do I need snuggle them enough? They have the dome liter box, the pet fountain, catnip flavored treats and access to all furniture so why are they being little jerks?!

Example: My cat Booger is amazing and lovely but lately he’s been meowing all day. He stood outside our door last night for an extremely long amount of time meowing and meowing and meowing and today he’s followed me around meowing and meowing and meowing. I’ve tried everything: he doesn’t want sink water, he’s not hungry, he’s not sick because in between meowing he chases Hudson, and he doesn’t want to be held and rubbed he just wants to follow me, gaze up and me and meow. They are loud “look at me I’m talking to you” meows and sometimes they vibrate deep in his chest.

I read this cat siteand I guess I should start ignoring Boogie but it’s so hard because he’s got this really big green eyes that are kind of irresistible.

I guess my question is, help besides ignoring him what can I do? Do your cats meow too much? Do you squirt them with water whenever they are annoying you?

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Oh my god that cat is huge. That cat is huge and I keep thinking “Oh my god oh my god” but not oh my god that cat is huge that’s gross oh my god my MOMS cat is almost as huge as that cat. I don’t even have photo evidence of the monstrosity that is Jade (my moms calico)because she hides all day…she’s bitter..every time I go to to visit my mom she’s a wee bit bigger than before.

If you’re bored at work, or fascinated by fat cats waste away your afternoon like I am

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Ok, yesterday I hated my cats but today they are tolerable…for two reasons.

1. Someone my fiannce works with passed on one of the cat fountains I mentioned before.. Yes, we are proud owners of one now! And it was free! Booger has been really into it, pawing the water, drinking..yes DRINKING THE WATER! This is key! He hasn’t even begged for sink water once! And we only caught him drinking out of a dirty bowl once so far today! The other cat digs it too..and I dig it, we are a happy family

2. We went out last night and bought whale shaped water guns that we have placed around the apartment. When a cat does something bad I squirt him directly in the face…or um, I mean wherever. It only took Hudson 1,151 squirts to not jump on the counter while I was making lunch today. So good! And I was worried that constantly correcting their behavior would make them hate us but after the one thousandth blast Hudson still purred in my lap. We win. Humans 1; Cats 150

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I don’t heart cats, like cats, love cats, or want cats today.

My cats are in terror mode, is it a full moon? I’ll have to check my Google homepage. Little jerks have done the following:

Knocked over my huge, heavy, impossible to move vase of flowers.
Continued to chew up our bed spring, digging holes in it so they can camp out INSIDE my bed.
Stolen little grippers on the bottom of my newly bleached tub, and carrying them around the house.
Tracking dirt, and fur all over the newly bleached tub.

I’m sure the list will go on, it’s only 4pm, if I’m not hating the feline world later I’ll post a funny picture but FTW right now.

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Summer is coming, my cats are hot, I feel awful. It’s only May but this morning Booger and Hudson were both lounging on the cool kitchen tiles because it’s humid..I contemplated joining them because I’m pregnant, and therefor way more sweaty than usual. TMI? Maybe. After a grueling morning of napping they are now sitting in the windows catching a nice breeze..as am I. But I feel awful, I want my cats to have the luxury of running around in the grass catching bugs and sniffing things and my fiannce and I often talk about letting Booger at least become an outside cat.

But than I remember all the feral cats I’ve seen in our backyard, the cat fights I hear, the diseases he could catch and the highway only a few blocks away and I’m pretty content having him sit in the window, and I hope he is too. About.com has some ideas for safe outdoor play for cats and I like some of them… Maybe not that..those cats don’t look happy to be alive.

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My fiannce keeps telling me to write about LOLcats and I keep wanting to but I get distracted by my own cats and their um drinking and eating habits, much more fascinating right? Not. Whenever I hear giggling coming from the other room I know he’s laughing at one of the amazinggggg cat photos If you don’t know, LOLcats is the best thing to ever happen to the internet because who doesn’t want to look at pictures of felines with funny captions? Only an asshole.

Some of the best places to go (while you’re working especially) are:
Icanhasacheezeburger?
Meme cats
LOLCATS

Also feel free to make your own and send them to me, so I can laugh all day long.

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A typical morning:
I am grumpy, I wake up to cats meowing outside my door (yes, I lock them out at night…they attack my toes when I’m trying to get beauty rest) I pour hefty bowls of cat food, and stumble back to my bedroom for more sleep. Booger, my beloved handsome devil is not hungry though, he’s doesn’t want to be held or pet..he wants the sink on and he wants it on now He will perch on our counter, lapping away at dripping water until his thirst is quenched, and than he’s ready to start his day.

What the hell? I change my cats water several times a day but it’s not good enough for Booger. On rare occasions I will catch him sipping from his water dish and I always stop and say “Look! Look babe Booger’s drinking water out of his water bowl to my fiannce. He always drinks just enough so he doesn’t die of thirst, and than he’s off on a quest for running water. When we shower, Booger will wait outside the door and when we are finished, will hop into the damp tub to catch water dripping from the faucet. I’ve even caught him swatting our loofah so that he can catch the falling droplets of water. I don’t know, I think my cat has OCD We love him though.

Do your cats love sinks/faucets/running water/puddle stomping? Should I say screw it and get my cat the Petmate Freshflow Pet Fountain?

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There are some cat toys I just don’t understand..balls with bells, yes I get that! They are cheap, and end up under the couch but you end up buying hundreds of them in a lifetime anyway. Sticks with feathers attached, I get that too! My cat Booger will play with one of those for hours..or until he breaks it (and we go and buy another one)..but this?
THING in a bag? Why the hell would you spend money on that? When I go grocery shopping and bring home bags I can just throw them all over the floor and the cats will have a blast..for free!

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There’s nothing I love more then buying my cats treats…for several (selfish) reasons:
-I like seeing them get all excited when I shake the treat bag (or box)…when I’m home alone I’ll go to different spots in my apartment, shake, and see how long it takes for them to come running (seconds mostly)..sometimes even if they’re in a deep sleep I will shake the bag, because I think it’s adorable to watch them come into the room blinking sleepies away like “hey sup, you shook? The treats? Where are they..” Sometimes I even say SIT, and um they don’t.
-When I’m getting ready for bed and the cats are attacking my toes/bed/fingers/each other and I want them out I just shake the treat canister and they come running. I throw them a handful and sprint back to my bedroom and slam the door. Um, and one time I shook a container of Tums just to get them out..am I evil?
-I want them to get fat, really fat, huge even..uhh..

Hudson (little guy featured below) will eat anything..bananas, turkey..we gave him Fillet mignon once when we ran out of cat food..but Booger is a little more picky about what he puts into his mouth. This said, I’ve found both cats really dig GREENIES I think they are pretty awesome…they help with bad breath, they clean my guys teeth, and they help with periodontal disease…and the cats love them. Go buy them! Guy buy tons of Greenies!

A part of me just really enjoys saying the word Greenie.

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